Monday, March 21, 2011

Ten Simple Ways To Win Friends And Influence People

taken from : http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Saleem_Rana go check her articles out, its awesome :D


Do you want to be more persuasive? Do you wish you had the "gift of the gab?"
Eloquence makes wonderful things happen. It opens mind and shifts attitudes. It also wins friends and influences people.

The "gift of the gab" is the power of personal influence. This has been highly prized throughout history. It has been the source of interesting myths because people have long considered eloquence to be magical. They believe it to be as potent as a charm. In Ireland, for example, it is believed that kissing the Blarney Stone, a part of the Blarney Castle, will give you enchanting fluency.

When you know how to say the right things at the right time, you will develop a knack for turning the tide of fate in your favor.
So, if you want to be more persuasive, rather than at a loss for words, here are 10 tips on how to develop the "gift of the gab."
By improving communication skills, you'll be able to be able to negotiate anything better. You'll be more persuasive. You'll excel at interviews. You'll sell more. You'll also be able to positively influence your boss and colleagues. And, finally, your family and friends will start to see things your way.

Learning how to be an effective communicator starts with a self-inventory.

1. What do you know?
An effective speaker is knowledgeable. They are well-educated about their favorite subject. They can tell you many interesting things about it. They command your attention because they know their subject. They can cite facts and figures. They can also hook your attention with interesting interpretations. Thus, to be persuasive, you have to have be knowledgeable.

2. Do you listen?
How do you persuade others? You get them to agree with you. To do this,
you have to know what they have on their minds. You can only find out by asking open-ended questions and carefully listening to their answers. It's almost impossible to be convincing if you have no rapport with your listeners. The best way to make others better listeners is to be a good listener yourself.

3. Do you have humility?
Natural born leaders have humility. They win friends and influence people by not assuming an imagined sense of superiority. They have a way of making people feel comfortable around them. They have humility. People open up to them and share their thoughts and feelings with them. Arrogant, smug people, on the other hand, unconsciously find many ways to make feel people resistant and uncooperative. Natural born leaders are approachable. They are not afraid to be human, even nurturing.

4. Do you maintain eye contact?
When you give someone your attention, you look into their eyes. This shows that you consider them important. They respond to your focus by returning the favor. Looking around or looking away when talking to someone tells them that you don't find them very interesting. While it is not necessary to stare someone down during a conversation, sufficient eye contact will create a sense of rapport.

5. Do you have a sense of humor?
The fastest way to win someone over is to make them laugh with you. It's almost impossible not to like, admire, and even respect someone who is humorous. It's almost impossible to disagree with someone when you feel good about something they have just said, even if the remark was just a witticism.

6. Do you like other people?
Many people do not like other people very much. They would rather interact with computers, machines, or even interesting books. They, in fact, feel uncomfortable with other people. Eloquent, persuasive people are neither preoccupied nor introverted. Instead, they are open and receptive to what other people say, think, and feel. They are approachable and friendly because they have people skills.

7. Are you "full of yourself?"
Someone who is only interested in getting other people to listen to their personal stories, anecdotes, and experiences is not persuasive. If this self-interest expands to bragging, then the only thing other people are interested in is getting away from you as quickly as possible. If they can't physically leave -- for example, you are all seated down together at a dining table -- then they mentally disengage from what you are saying.

8. Do you smile?
A smile, like eye contact, is a non-verbal, rapport-builder. You can better express what you're saying when you smile.

9. Do you know someone who can be a role model?
One of the fastest ways to move away from feeling inhibited or tongue-tied is to associate with people who are natural talkers. Listening to them, you will automatically develop a knack for building rapport. You'll also learn how to communicate effectively and engagingly.

10. Do you prepare your ideas ahead of time?
In a formal setting, such as at a job interview, a business negotiation, or a persuasive speech, knowing what you will say well ahead of time, will result in a marvelous fluency when you need to present your point of view. So, rehearse and practice what you intend to say.
These ten tips will help you learn how to win friends and influence people. They will make you warmer and more approachable. You will become someone whom others enjoy spending time with talking about things. These ten tips are the next best thing to kissing the Blarney Stone. These communication techniques will make you charming.

Saleem Rana would love to share his inspiring ideas with you. Hunting everywhere for a life worth living? Discover the life of your dreams. His book Never Ever Give Up tells you how. It is offered at no cost as a way to help YOU succeed.http://www.theempoweredsoul.com/enter.html Copyright 2004 Saleem Rana. Please feel free to pass this article on to your friends, or use it in your ezine or newsletter. It's a shareware article.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Guerilla guide to win people series: Initial Positive Impression part 1

by adrian ayz

Well, some of my friends have asked me, how to win people easily..ehm...actually this kind of things are better be explained by the Pros like Anthony Robbins or David Lieberman, but maybe I can give my own view on how I actually did it and my theory on some technique.

WARNING : The technique that I'm gonna share below may not always work and should be used responsibly and ethically. Do not use this technique to deliberately manipulate people or worse, your own friends. No individuals should be put in any disadvantage after the technique is done as the technique is designed in such a way that no one is at disadvantages

Initial Positive Impression,ever heard the term before? should be not, because this is the theory that I come up with myself and I merely told a glimpse of my friends only. So what's this all about? lets take a closer look !!!


IPI (Initial Positive Impression).


This is a great technique to be done at the start of your way of winning people. As the name suggests, this technique is basically create a good impression of you from your target, so at the subsequent events or encounters with the targets, their subconscious impression on you will be based by their IPI.

Maybe a little bit confusing , so lets take a relevant example:
Supposedly you want to get a good result in your English writing class. what you want to do is first to get a good impression from your English teacher that you are good at writing, even though you may not be that good. If at your first test you get very high result and your essay is flooded with accurate eye-pooping facts and has successfully convinced your teacher that you're a pro in the subject, in the subsequent writing test, you're essay will be marked as high even though the facts inside the essay may not be accurate. This is simply because the teacher believes that the facts that you give them are already been researched thoroughly by you. A good impression has been inside their mind from the start of your encounter with the target.

So how do we exactly hit the 'right positive' impression at first? of course there are techniques which we will discuss in the next part, see ya until then

Dream.Hope.Destiny

A worn out soccer balls, a pair of heavily-used soccer shoes. They hold a single boy's dream of becoming a soccer player. The boy's dream of running on a grass field of the biggest stadium in the world, his dream of kicking the ball, send it to the back of the net of the best goalkeeper in the world. His dream of hearing the crowd chanting his name, standing up and give him a standing ovation. And the boy still holding his dream...until now...and if he has the heart to hold his dream, why shouldn'te we? Keep dreaming because Dreams are the touchstones of our character....

©AYZphoto

It owes you Nothing!

by Adrian AYZ


"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first." 
-Mark Twain-


Taken aback?? well you're not alone...to hear such a pinpoint square-fingered quote from an otherwise humorist Mark Twain, is really something for me also. However, many may not know that, other than his well-known long lasting Tom Sawyer tale, Mark Twain is also famous for his controversial view on abolition and emancipation. moreover, his citation of such a quote tells a lot of his admirable personalities, tough and unbreakable.


When some of us, including me and maybe you, sometimes complaining about life, feel that we deserve more than we already have & boldly, sotoy-ly claim that our future is in a misery after an unfortunate accident(s) ( getting a disastrous result in so-called 'life-decisive test'  is included,some of you know what i mean:P), Twain's quote should strike and silence us..life owes you nothing!!! Life isn't fair after all, we are the one who must find our own justice!! When life treats you unfairly, never breakdown, get up, earn your own justice!!!!FUYO!!!!